How to Walk Into A Room with Freedom

Decide Who You Will Think About

What if the next time I walk into a room, I decide not to think about me?

No, to wondering what others may think of me.

No, to feeling insecure, protective, or afraid.

No, to I’m not good enough.

No, to comparison.

For some, walking into a room is as effortless as a feather falling in the wind – whether that room is crowded or calm. Your confidence is steady, though perhaps sometimes a little too swift, and your energy is inspiring. For others, walking into a room - crowded or calm - is as awkward as waving at someone only to realize they weren’t waving at you. Either way, the assumption we all can all too often make is that entering a room is about us. About our presence. About our next move. And it’s an exhausting way to walk.

But …

What if the next time I walk into a room, I decide to think about the other person?

Yes, to wondering what their story may be.

Yes, to being confident yet humble, vulnerable and brave.

Yes, to God is good enough.

Yes, to connection.

For some, this will be harder than for others; perhaps, particularly for the introverts in the room. But as an introvert who thrives in solitude and silence, I assure you that by the grace of God, entering a room with you on my mind has been one of the most freeing discoveries I’ve had in the last decade. Mind you, I’m a work-in-progress. But as I have put in the work to discover how God has uniquely designed and gifted me, it has spurred on my curiosity to notice the people in the room over my presence in it.

Remember One Simple Phrase

I have found myself wanting to know more about you, and your story, too. For the first time in my life (nearly five decades in), I am learning the deep value of “weightless wonder.” In other words, I am making it my aim to enter a space not with information about me (and all the head noise that comes with that), but rather with questions all about you. After all, you are an expert on you and who doesn’t like to talk about what they know best? Even in our differences, we share common ground when we share our stories, and this almost always leads to sweet, unforced, and yeah, sometimes brave conversation with people who I “walk into a room” with …

People I see on a daily basis,

People I see at special events,

People I see at my usual places ~

People I am seeing in a whole new light.

What if, the next time I walk into a room, I make this one simple phrase my first thought?

You matter.

Who knows, you may even find a new, beautiful friend. A new, unexpected assignment. A new, empowering freedom.

Walk By These Words

*Tim Keller, now in the glorious room of Heaven, writes, “Gospel humility is not needing to think about myself. Not needing to connect things with myself. It is an end to thoughts such as, ‘I’m in this room with these people, does that make me look good? Do I want to be here?’ True gospel-humility means I stop connecting every experience, every conversation, with myself. The freedom of self-forgetfulness. The blessed rest that only self-forgetfulness brings.” (Tim Keller, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness)

*Emily P. Freeman, in her podcast-turned-book, The Next Right Thing, reminds us: “We bring what we believe about ourselves and what we believe about God into every situation, gathering, and decision. I don’t want to live by default. I want to walk into rooms with presence and on purpose, aware of people for God’s sake rather than for my sake. ... We are free. We are free. We are free. May this change how we walk into rooms.”

*Paul, while in a prison cell, wrote to the church in Philippi ~ to the church, in you and me: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves. Everyone should look not to his own interests, but rather to the interests of others.” Philippians 2:3-4, CSB

With grace, Jodie

{Note: I was honored to share a variation of this post over on Family Christian during the month of June. If you like, you can find it here.}